Dude has a wife and a kid. It makes some sense that he wants to play at his place, but yeah the bitching about what and how you play is dumb.

Just set a firm "no bitching" rule. And maybe tell him to come out of his envelope sometime. Give it time, if y'all wanna play, you'll work it out.

But yeah, the play my way or don't play thing is stupid, and I'd be less inclined to play with the guy.