Thread: Springtime in Estalia

Emilie stands above the corpse of a Dark elf cultist, a peasant's arrow buried in his skull. "And this is how your immortality ends, elf. One would hope that with a thousand commoner lifetimes, you would have found something better to do with it. Pity."

A Mercenary horseman rides up aside Emilie, his Tilean finery slightly tattered by the battle. "Duke, the dark ones have withdrawn from the field. We've taken the battle."

Emilie nods his head. "How are the losses?"

"Us or them?" The mercenary reponds with an uncommon cheer for a sell-sword.

"Us."

"The bloody harpies took out the war machines, the Grail Knights are mostly wiped out and Henri... the guy with the banner... Right, he ate some magic and it melted him like wax... But that's it."

"The peasants are unfortunate but their sacrifice saved the lives of many others. As for the grail knights... I'm begining to think that death to them isn't what it is to likes of you or I. (pause) Is that all?"

The mercenary looks around, something is bothering him... Emilie looks up at him. "For a sell-sword, you're a rotten liar. Spit it out, man. I don't pay you to be pretty and tell me only good news."

The mercenary sighs. "The Prophetess is drunk again, she's wandering around as a big monster... Scaring men like crazy!"

"She does that... Ignore her."

"She's eating, Duke."

"Eating what?"

"Elves... sir... She's eating the corpses of the elves..."

Emilie stops dead in his tracks, he looks at the mercenary... "I see... we will have to deal with that... when she's sober and less life threatening. Is there anything else horrible that you have to tell me?"

"There are a bunch of Dwarves in our camp... They look mad."

"Dwarves always looks mad.... It's the itchy beards... I'll talk to them."

Emilie walks off... He spies a giant fire dragon devouring naked female elves , while slapping around the remains of a large pot with her tail. "Nothing good is going to come of this..."

Liliaine is sitting under a tree, looking out onto what was once the battle-field where her and Emilie fought the Dark Ones. All the bodies have been cleared out, the only reminders that a battle took place are the divots and bare earth were soliders all engaged in combat... and a patch of earth where a massive fire dragon vomited acidic elf parts onto the ground. Polluting the soil for only a mere generation, or two...

Emilie walks up behind her, she doesn't move, still fixated on the field.

"It's oddly peaceful, isn't it."

Liliaine stirs slighly, Emilie stands next to her.

"This isn't what you expected at all, isn't it?"

Liliaine doesn't turn her head.

"When we talk to the Errants about battle we call it, 'seeing the dragon', because no words can prepare you for what warfare will bring, what it'll be like... You have to see dragon for yourself."

Lilianie is unmoved "I am the dragon."

"You're a mage who can turn into a dragon to scare caravan guards away to steal their plunder. You're no dragon... and you're better off for it. Would you like crazy Sigmar fanatics shooting cannons at you for the rest of your life? How about being enslaved by Dark Elf magic to be ridden like a horse."

Liliaine laughs a bit, he turns to Emilie "I didn't think it would be like this... so much death."

"Nobody does. I've been fighting since I was a boy, this is my life... To you this must seem like madness."

"I'll be fine, Emilie... I agreed to come with you for reason... If don't stick around, I'll never find out why."

Emilie takes a step back. "What?"

"The Lady works in mysterious ways, brave knight.... And, I need to keep an eye on you, make sure you don't give any more of my gifts away to those nasty, drunken, no-good Dwarves."

"Once the campaign is over Prophetess, we'll discuss the "helmet" incident... Suffice to say, I think I averted a major war, or at least more screaming from angry bearded ones."

WACK!! Liliaine playfully tags Emilie in the leg with her staff.

"Discuss! There's nothing to discuss! I am a Prophetess and my word is beyond reproach!"

"Your acidic elf-laden vomit is what is truly beyond reproach, Milady."

WACK! She hits him again...

Suddenly a rider comes up to both of them... "I got news!" He bellows "Morikhi has declared that he's going to kill all the vampires in the world!"

Liliaine interrupts "I heard a man who was covered in his own piss claim he was Sigmar reincarnated."

Emilie continues "Half the damn Empire thinks they are Sigmar reincarnated if you get them drunk enough..."

"Milords!" The rider continues "Grail knight has taken all the forces and moved north! To kill all the vampires in the world!"

Emilie stops mocking, now its serious.... "What? I have a campagin to run! he just can't run off with the entire force to chase some Damn Vampire around!

"Well... that would explain why isn't been so quiet lately... Let's pay our Grail Knight friend a visit, shall we?"

"Yes. Let's"

Emilie and and Liliaine head off to see just what happened to our fair Grail Knight...

Emilie looks over the battlefield... He sees's a massive Dark Elf host slowly advancing on what is left of Grail Knight Morikhi's army, coming to consume what is left after the Grail Knight's failed attempt to "End Vampires" ended as all rational people expected it would. At he head of the army strides a massive, seven foot Dark Elf. Shirtless with a massive magical axe. Behind him are his slaves, dragging trophies from his previous victories. Liliaine rides up next to Emilie, she spies the Hunter.

"Wow... That's one mean looking Elf."

"He's going to add Morikhi's head to that collection if I don't cut him off."

"Is that a Wyvern head?"

"Yes... with an Orc's arm still holding on. It's next to the jar of Fimir's testicles... I think that's what it is..."

Liliaine leans in close to Emilie... "You don't have to do this."

"He is under my protection I don't have a choice..."

"That's what men always say... You have a choice."

Emilie kicks his horse and rides off to meet the Hunter in the field.

Emilie is laying on the grass, his helmet is off and black ooze slowly pours out his mouth. Crossbow bolts stick out of Emilie’s armor, reminders that he was in a battle with the treacherous Dark Elves. Emilie spits out the last of the black ooze, a vile concoction of Dark magic, bile and his own blood…

He passes out…

Emilie wakes up, a massive shirtless Dark Elf is standing over him, holding the head of a Grail Knight. The Hunter’s slaves surround him, holding heads and other body parts as trophies, silently giggling… It would be a louder giggle, but the Hunter had all their mouths sewn shut and sealed with wax.

“You are not worthy of death by my hand, monkey.” The Hunter utters as he tosses the Grail knight’s head onto Emilie’s chest. “You have deprived me of my rightful kill, now I will kill 1000 slaves to redeem my axe’s honor.”

Emilie watches the Hunter walk over to a pen where over a 1000 naked, beaten, slaves are. The slavers beg for mercy, for these slaves will replace those lost in the flood… The Hunter’s men knock out the slave guards and the slaughter begins…

Black…

“He’s alive? Emilie! Emilie!” Emilie opens his eyes and sees Liliane running up to him on the field. “Get Help! He’s hurt! You can’t die now! That’s not how this is supposed to end!.. You haven’t found it yet, Damn it!!” Men at arms are running towards Emilie..

Black…

Emilie wakes up, he sitting in a bed, his wounds have been bandaged up. Morikhi and Liliane are standing next to him… Emilie turns his head towards Morikhi.

“You have one chance to explain yourself, just one. I sent my army against a vastly superior foe to prevent your skull from becoming a gravy boat for a Dark Elf mass murderer.”

“I think the gravy boat treatment would be a fitting end..”

“You’re not helping Liliane…”

“I must deeply apologize for my act…”

Emilie cuts Morikhi off “I don’t give damn if you’re sorry! You didn’t spill a pitcher of milk on the floor! You violated my standing orders and took an army on an idiotic quest and got them all killed for your personal glory! Then I had to throw more men to the butcher to save you from your own stupidity….”

Liliane interrupts “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Yes I did.”

Morikhi looks up at both of them “Yes he did… and I did what I did to redeem our people.”

“Bull****! Redeem my ass, you stupid glory addict! I’m not going to sit in this room and listen to two knights talk about honor all damn night!” Liliane storms out of the room.

Morikhi watches her walk away. “In my day, my Lord, we did not allow women to speak to us in that matter.”

“In your day you would have been hung for treason on the spot.”

Morikhi pauses… he sighs. “That’s… probably true. I do owe you an answer… Did what I did because we, like I, have slept for hundreds of years while the armies of our enemies have grown stronger and more advanced.”

“Go on.”

“We used to laugh at the toys of the Empire, at the way they used to march around in formation… Like some comedy. We used to laugh at the Goblins, the Skaven… even the Dark Elves. (pause) Nobody laughs at them anymore. They have grown stronger while we have done nothing but talk about honor and hold pointless jousts! I wanted to prove that we were a force to be dealt with.”

Emilie sits up “You violated my orders, stole a host of men for your own personal quest because you felt that we were inferior? Are you mad?”

“You asked for my reasons, My Lord. As per my oath I shall accept any punishment you deem necessary for this transgression.”

“You will, at your own expense, build our saintly and impeccably pure Prophetess Liliane a massive wizard tower. You will build it to her requirements and demands and she will be in charge of all aspects of the design and construction.”

“I’d prefer to be hung, my Lord.”

“I’m not letting you off that easy. Get cracking, Grail Knight, you’ve got a Lady’s Waiting Room to build.”

End…

Emilie is standing in field surveying his victory over the bizarre Fimir people from the Island of Albion. He rides over to what is left of their camp and sees three casks of Bretonnian wine sitting on the ground, left behind by the Fimir. One of the advisors was looking over the caskets and holding some paperwork taken from the camp.

“It appears that our diplomatic offering was not met well…”

The Advisor looks up “No Milord… it was not… It appears that the Fimir were offended by the offer of our fine wine and decided to attack… Or they were bored… Or somebody lost a bet… It’s hard to tell with that race.”

“I see. Why would be they be offended by our wine?”

“Well… See those peasants going through uncontrollable spasms near the beer garden? Emilie looks over and sees half a dozen peasants going through uncontrollable spasms of vomiting, screaming, and other bodily fluids too varied to mention.

“By the Lady? What happened to them?”

“Fimir Beer Milord. Fimir beer. It seems that Fimir beer is so strong that they thought we were mocking them with our wine.”

“Really?”

“Maybe… or they thought we sent them barrels of our own urine as a way to poison them… Or, they didn’t even open them and just fired comets at us for fun. They walk around naked, so you never know what they’re like… Damn man-nudity.”

Emilie sighs “As always, your understanding of the situation makes everything clear.”